trained 2 days ago and my body still hurts. i walk like a guy who just got paddled. i did not hurl last training but i surely sucked.

darn, i still could not make anyone tap. worse, i think i’m making records for most taps in 5 minutes. that’s with me trying not to tap out to choke attempts until i could still manage to breathe. mental note, need to tap less, need to make someone tap.

more girls in class last training and i think, make that i’m sure, they last longer than me. they even perform the techniques better than i do. darn! mental note, focus on the techniques.

i look, i listen… but my mind goes blank. crap, this is not a good place to have attention deficit episodes. it’s not that i’m not listening or am not willing to learn. i never intend to show any disrespect so i definitely won’t do that. i’m just plain sloooow. spirit is willing, body and mind weak, and the three entities having communication problems… i know i’m old but i want to get the hang of this. oh, about being old, i’m even more than half the age of some students. knowing how i am on the mat, makes me feel even older.

instructor’s right when he said… i have to try.

but.. it’s not that i’m not trying, it’s just not showing…

mental note, get smart, try harder.

anyway, senior purple belt mentioned kosen judo, i’d try to read about it.